Saturday, December 24, 2011

Pennsylvania

Robert and I had such a great time in Pennsylvania.  That's where my dad's side of the family lives.  He had met some of them when they visited MO in the summer of 2010.  He got to meet the rest of the family during this trip.  Highlights included:
  • Seeing Grandma and Grandpa's new house for the first time
  • Going to church with my grandparents
  • The food: Thanksgiving feast, best pizza in the country, Polish feast
  • Day in Benton - This is where my grandparents lived for about 33 years before moving to Berwick.  I got to show Robert all the places we used to go: the old house, fire station, post office, schools, park, dam, Tasty Freeze Ice Cream, Uncle Doug's apartment.  We even fed the ducks at the golf course and went on a good hike.
  • Picked up Ryan from school and got to see Aunt Cathy's classroom.
  • Made a gingerbread house with Ryan
  • Countless games of Phase 10 Masters, Scrabble, and Pinnochle
  • Penn State - Even though the school has gone through a lot lately it's still my dad's alma mater, and it's still a great place.  We pretty much saw everything: football statdium, art gallery, libraries, dorm, union, bookstore, Old Main, a new building being built, and so much more.  We had lunch at The Corner Room and ice cream at Berkey Creamery.
  • Uncle Doug took us around one day, and we got to see a beautiful waterfall.   He also took us up a mountain where he and Dad had one of their first jobs.  They cut grapvines off of trees for their next doo neighbor, Otto Little, who owned a lumberyard. 
We had such a great time!  Robert loves my family, and they love him, too!  I enjoyed getting to learn more about my grandparents' lives and growing up years.  They're such a good example of faithful servants.  They've been through so much - humble beginnings, sickness, and setbacks - but they're still able to genuinely praise the Lord for His goodness.  I'm thankful for such great examples in my life.

Sunday, December 11, 2011

3/4

It's crazy to think that I'm almost finished with another semester of grad school.  Three terms down.  One term to go.  This is crazy to think about.  Just about six months ago I was calling my parents and begging them if I could quit.  They were in Pennsylvania for my first day (and first week, for that matter) of grad school.  I felt alone.  Robert helped as much as humanly possible, but I had to do so much of it on my own.  Nobody else could read my textbooks for me.  Nobody could write my papers for me.  It seemed like such a daunting task.  I think I called my parents every day while they were in Pennsylvania.  I would talk to them on my drive home each evening.  The conversation usually went something like this:
Me: "I hate this program!"
Parents: "I'm sure it's not that bad."
Me: "It is.  I'm going to just go to the admin building tomorrow and drop out."
Parents: "Can you please just wait to make a decision until we get back?"
Me: "No.  Forget it.  I'm almost home.  I'll talk to you later."

Every single day I'd have visions of marching up to the admin building and withdrawing.  It wouldn't be that bad.  I wouldn't feel like too much of a loser.  It's not like anyone would even notice I wasn't there anymore.  I'm an adult, and I can make my own decisions.  It felt like such a lost cause, but then one night I talked to my brother.  He had gone through a similar experience when he made the transition from high school to college at a very prestigious college - Washington University in St. Louis.  It was a really difficult situation, and after one year he transferred to SBU, but he stuck it out for a whole year.  He talked about it being a real struggle.  He had some of the same feelings and thoughts I was experiencing, but then he talked about how good it felt to be able to say that he completed the school year and passed all of his classes.  He spent more time than ever reading the Word and praying to God.  I decided all I had to two was finish the first term which was only 19 days.  After that I would re-evaluate things.

Well, I started to do well.  I was getting papers and presentation scores back, and they all read "A."  I was so thrilled!  My hard work was paying off.  Sure, I studied from 6:00 a.m. - 4:00 p.m., and I even studied while I ate.  I didn't shave - there wasn't time!  I left for school at 4:30 and came home at 9:00.  I studied until midnight.  Went to sleep and did it all over again.  This time in my life felt like forever.  Looking back it seems rather pathetic when I realize it was a mere 19 days - not even three weeks.  God used this time to help me realize that it's okay to ask others for help.  Believe it or not, the people who love me are actually delighted to help.  My parents, grandparents, and Robert have proofread countless papers, listened to me practice presentations, driven me to and from class on days when I needed to nap in the car, quizzed me for tests, listened to my struggles, cheered me on every step of the day, and celebrated my succeses with me.  I get a little choked up just thinking about it to be honest.  I knew these people loved me, but the sacrifices they have made in order to help me succeed are astounding.  I don't know what to say other than thank you.  It means more than words can express.

So as I enter finals week I'll study hard, think about past successes, and remind myself that God has been with me every minute of my life, and He'll continue to do the same no matter how well I do on a test and how loudly the class claps after I present.

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