A Week of Celebrating

Robert and I had such a fun week celebrating and 1st wedding anniversary.  The official day was last Monday, May 20.  I came home for work and Robert had a delicious dinner made - pork tenderloin, carrots, potatoes, cucumber salad, chocolate cake, homemade ice cream, and sweet tea.  He was dressed up and wore the tie he wore at our wedding.  He had beautiful guitar music playing and several candles lit.  He had set up a small round table in our living room.  It was complete with a white tablecloth, cloth napkins, a pink daisy, and crystal drinking glasses.  He had three dresses of mine sitting out for me to choose from.  I changed clothes and we exchanged cards.  Then I found a pair of pearl earrings.  My parents bought me some pearl earrings a couple of years ago for Christmas, but when we moved to North Carolina that got lost somewhere and we never found them.  I was heartbroken to have lost them.  Robert knew that and surprised me with a new pair for our anniversary.  Dinner was delicious.  Robert made me promise not to talk about work at all which was really nice.  After dinner we watched Elizabethtown on Netflix and took a walk.  Robert sure is thoughtful.

Three of my lovely bridesmaids put on their dresses in honor of our one year anniversary

The deer mounts really add something special

This weekend we went to our friend Rylee's wedding.  Rylee is from Missouri, but she came to North Carolina to go to college and met her husband there so they decided to have their wedding here in NC.  It was a bit of a drive at four hours, but we decided that it's not every day that we have a MO friend get married in NC so it was definitely worth the drive.  We got to see so many of our MO friends.  It was wonderful!  The wedding was beautiful.  It was on top of a mountain and the weather was perfect - sunny, 75 degrees, a bit breezy but not too windy.

With the beautiful bride and her awesome brother/our great friends

After the wedding we drove another 45 minutes to stay in a hotel in order to go to the Biltmore the next day.  I had been there about 10 years ago, but Robert had never been before.  It was great!  It was overcast but not rainy.  The flowers were gorgeous and the house was stunning.  After that, we headed home.  Robert and I both agreed that we hate driving and riding in the car.  We love the idea of road trips but hate the whole road part.

We rounded out the weekend with a super lazy Monday.  We slept in, took a walk, watched TV, played games, and cleaned the house.  It was great!  And now we only have a four day work week.  YAY!

Happy Anniversary

Robert and I have been married for one year today.  It's kind of hard to believe that just one year ago I was about to walk down the aisle and make a lifelong commitment to remain faithful and loving to Robert Clark Varner for as long as we both shall live.  In some says it feels like we've been married forever.  It's weird to think about life without Robert as my sidekick/me being his sidekick.  I can't say that this first year has been easy.  Before we were married I would always hear people say things like, "When we first got married I was so shocked to find out that ________ left his socks on the floor."  Well, I guess Robert and I dated long enough that we knew that both of us always have and always will leave our socks on the floor.  We both hate doing the dishes and would rather do just about any other chore.  We both love spending time with friends but renew our energy with quiet time on our own.  I can talk about my day for hours when I get home.  Robert can sum up his day in about 2 minutes.  We already knew that about each other.  But when you think about those things they seem so unbelievably insignificant.  Dirty socks on the floor - sure, they're annoying.  Would it be nice if we both always put them in the dirty clothes basket the second we got home?  Yes.  But really - who cares?  I guess that's something I've learned in this first year of marriage - to try and appreciate Robert for the person God has created him to be and to decipher when it's worth the battle and when I should just appreciate our differences and quirks. I'm not going to pretend like I'm perfect at this.  After all, who hasn't had a meltdown about the way your spouse unloads the dishwasher? :)

Our pastor had a really fitting sermon at church yesterday.  He's doing a six week series on marriage.  I think this was week three.  Anyway, he was talking about how we've started looking at marriage as the only way to be completely fulfilled and satisfied.  (Think "you're the wind beneath my wings")  When we think this way we will always always ALWAYS be dissatisfied and let down.  Robert is absolutely wonderful.  He is thoughtful, smart, funny, handsome, a good cook, and a hard worker.  But Robert will never meet all of my needs, and I will never meet all of his needs.  Leaving with that kind of pressure is way too much.  If I look to Robert to meet all of my needs and he lets me down, what on earth am I supposed to do?  Get angry at him, let him know he let me down, belittle him?  That won't do.  But if I'm finding satisfaction in God it doesn't matter if Robert forgets to tell me I'm beautiful 50 times a day.  Although I will say he is a great encourager.

I have plenty more learning and growing up to do in the coming years of our marriage, but I guess my "advice" after one year would be to avoid having expectations that no human can meet.  I hate the concept of never expecting anything so you're never let down.  That has always seemed so depressing to me and seems like a bad outlook on life, but I think he has a bit of truth.  Be a grace giver - a person who gives second and third and fiftieth chances.  A person who is thankful when another person does something kind a thankful.

Now, let's reflect on some highlights from our first year as Mr. and Mrs.:

Celebrating Robert's 22nd birthday

The first big rain since our arrival in NC.  Little did we know that it would be dreary 9 days out of 10 during our first year here...

My Blackboard logo cake to celebrate my new job.  Told you Robert was a great cook!

A trip to VA for some rafting

Many many many puzzles and games

Our first Thanksgiving

Our first Christmas

Time with our BFF Jolie and her awesome parents, Ben and Allie

End of the school year fun

Of course I was sad to stay behind, but I was glad that Robert got to spend that time with his dad.  The best part was that Robert surprised me by coming home a day early.  To say I was happy would be an understatement.  Before leaving, Robert gave me a gift certificate for a massage at a local spa.  The massage therapist wasn't able to get me in while Robert was gone, but I was able to go the next Saturday while Robert was at work.  It was wonderful!

This Sunday Robert was able to play in Faith's worship band for the first time.  A few weeks ago he let the leader know that he was interested in becoming a substitute for acoustic guitar.  They met and he asked Robert to play a couple of weeks later.  Robert loves singing and playing the guitar so he was very excited for this opportunity.  It was great!

Robert and I have signed up to help with preschool music for Vacation Bible School.  We had our first meeting for it last night.  Colossal Coaster World, here we come!

This weekend we hosted a going away party for our dear friends Ben, Allie, and Jolie.  They have helped make this first year at seminary so much better for Robert and me.  We're sad to see them go, but we're excited for their new adventure.  We had a BBQ at Joyner park with about 15 people from our complex.  We also surprised Ben and Allie with presents for their baby boy who will be arriving in just a few weeks.